Sometimes you have to let the other guy win
I think sometimes we all keep score of things even if we don’t want to. Today’s score has CP in the lead with us trailing behind picking up the discarded water bottles, snack bags, dirty socks and sweaty towels. We put up a good fight, got a little bloody, showed some real team spirit, but someone has to win the day.
Yesterday, we purchased a wheelchair.
Well, we ordered one and hope the insurance company actually purchases it, but that’s just details.
A doctor told us a few years ago that we were torturing Max by making him walk, “Just buy the kid a wheelchair and let him be.” We fired the doctor.
By no means does this suggest that Max will not spend most of his time walking – it just means that we finally have to see the truth. Without having a wheelchair at his disposal, he might not be able to fully participate in life. He might want to go somewhere, take a trip away from here, get out there, and with a wheelchair he might be able to do all of that a bit easier and a lot more independently ( Read: without mom and dad.)
If he recovers fully from his surgery, he should be able to walk around most of the time. But, even in the best case scenario, he PROBABLY won’t be able to travel to Europe, cross a college campus, or get to work on time. Maybe he will, and if there is any chance of that, I know Max will do his absolute best. Max used a wheelchair when he was a toddler, and once, when he fractured his foot and we planned a vacation to Florida, he had a transport chair that we used to get him through the airport and around the hotel. Sophie and Max thought it was hysterical to ride him in his chair and have him suddenly get up and proclaim, “Thank you, praise God, it’s a miracle!!”
A wheelchair is a living breathing part of people’s lives – it gives them freedom, choice, security and speed. I never want to diminish how vital a chair is for people who need and want one – never disrespect the chair as it is part of a person’s body and should be treated as such. We just never really thought Max would need one.
No one wants to need one.
He still wants and needs to look like Max so we agreed that this chair was going to be as small and sleek as possible. He needs nothing more than some wheels attached to his bottom, but that is easier said than done. There are so many options, styles, attachments, accessories, colors, safety features, materials and measurements that I have never been more confused. Of course, that insurance company I previously mentioned doesn’t really have the same sense of style I do, so we might have to compromise a bit.
It has to be fast, small, lightweight and adjustable because he is still growing, and he needs to be able to pop a wheelie (his requirement, not mine) Other than that, we are basically beholden to the vendor and the insurance guy. We probably won’t actually get the chair for several months so it’s kind of an investment in the future.
Last night, I did what any self-respecting CP mom would do. I googled. I googled some weird stuff so I hope no one is tracing my history. I searched:
“Hot guys in wheelchairs,”
“Handsome young men who use wheelchairs,”
“Wheelchairs and tattoos,”
“Teenage boys in wheelchairs,” and finally, ” BMX stunts in wheelchairs.”
I just needed to see that my boy will be ok – wheelchair or no wheelchair.